When You're Plastered

There are plenty of words to describe it: bladdered, slaughtered, mullered, legless or as drunk as a skunk. Call it what you will, if you keep drinking beyond the early warning signs you're heading for trouble - trouble focussing, trouble speaking, trouble keeping upright.

For that classic sitcom moment, the thing to do at the end of the evening is fall off the barstool. Falling over is a common mistake when drunk because alcohol affects the cerebellum, the part of the brain that controls fine movements. If finding the end of your nose with your index finger is difficult, you know your cerebellum has been affected.

Brewer's droop
They may have impressed their mates, but men may be in for some embarrassment in the bedroom after drinking ten pints. Booze interferes with the nerve endings that control an erection, and it also reduces levels of testosterone, the hormone that controls sexual desire. Hard luck lads!

Blotto
Researchers think they know why inebriated people sometimes pass out. When people stand up their blood pressure drops and a sober body responds by tightening blood vessels. After knocking back a skinful, this system no longer works, which is why standing up to leave can induce a faint.

The danger zone
Drinking heavily is very dangerous. A major session can affect the medulla or brain-stem, which controls the basic functions of the body that keep you alive. Large quantities of drink cause a similar effect to general anaesthesia and lead to lack of consciousness and even death.

Next page: Why do you feel so bad the day after a heavy night out drinking?